It’s not about the bunny - part 4

 It’s not about the bunny, it’s about God’s great and never-failing, never-ending Love for us. In my story, however, the bunny shows up in my life, a visual reminder of God’s Love for me.

He did it again. I pulled up about 9:30 this morning and there he was, hopping along our fence line and then hopped through the space between our fence and house and into our backyard. He brings me peace and joy, the peace and joy of Jesus… because every good and perfect comes from Above, Jesus, first and foremost and this bunny.

It’s not about the bunny - part 3

Jesus. It’s all about Jesus, the sweetest love I’ve found.

God’s Timing is perfect. All His ways are good.

Today, I stepped outside to run a few errands. Right outside my door, a bunny. He began to run away and all I could keep  saying was “I Love you”. He seemed to calm down. He ran around the corner and I kept talking to him.

He stopped, I sat on the ground, he looked at me and after a little while started to hop back towards me! He  wasn’t far from me and had I been able to sit longer, he may have gotten closer. Melt my heart. Thank you Lord.

6 weeks

6 weeks ago, i wrote about being in the "eye of the storm" Glory to God for some amazing results from the doctors office. If a picture is worth a thousand words, then what I saw on the scans was just that. I had to squeeze the information out of the doctor, I had to literally ask him HOW good was this. He said "excellent" but then continued to set up further treatments and pokes and prods.  With the storm of this trial calming, I'm afraid a new one may be on the rise. I continue to put my Hope and my Trust in You Lord Jesus Christ.

Summer in Winter

I am blessed to have two young ladies in my life. Grace and Summer.

I'll tell this story until my last breath, that God audibly told me to name Grace, Grace.
I didn't however hear so much as a peep about what to name my second born.
In fact, I was so convinced she was a "he"... that I really had no girl names in my mind at all.

So... my husband and I decided it was okay that our 9 year old name our newborn... and Summer it was.

I'll admit, I've had some (minor) reservations about this name... is it awkward that we spelt it the same as the actual season... maybe.  Whether or not it was God's plan for her, he most certainly is revealing that He uses it ALL for His Good.

It's been a heavy winter.  Northern MN winters are always bitter cold. Cold winds. Cold below zero temps. Mounds of heavy, cold snow.  Born and raised here, it's no surprise to me and it may honestly have conditioned me to handle the other types of seasons in our lives.

This winter is a season of winter in my personal life. Colder and darker by the hour... losing daylight, sunlight, the source of light and warmth. Glory to God that He's been building my faith for the past 10 years... faith of a mustard seed is all we need... it's keeping the faith, day in and day out, season after season that is the true test. Truly believing that HE is our source of light and warmth in every hour, in every season.

James 1: 2-4
2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

Seasons of trials pass. In this season of winter, I'm grateful for our sweet Summer.

Matthew 28:18

18 Then Jesus came to them and said, “All authority in heaven and on earth has been given to me. 19 Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, 20 and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

Eye of the storm

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-sx8wTnnfSc

The Eye of the Storm

"I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith..." —Ephesians 3:16

Today there is a peace felt like no other I may have ever experienced.  An external peace, if you will.
Today, Jimmy (my father with dementia) is content moving papers around upstairs while my 5 month old is sleeping like a 'baby'  and my husband just went down for a morning nap as well.
Peace is covering this house.
Interestingly enough, however, a storm of strong winds rage just outside these four walls. We are in a windchill advisory... and the shutters are literally rattling.
If this is the eye of the storm that my family is currently in... then this gives me great encouragement, great hope and possibly a great revelation.
Our storm began about 6 weeks ago when my husband drove himself to the Emergency room while on his way to work, early one morning.
They released him a few hours later and he came home early to tell me that he had gone in.
I won't get into the details of his diagnosis, only that it surely has been a whirlwind of doctor appointments, drugs and detailed lists of what to do and not to do, what to eat and not to eat... etc. 
If today is in fact, the eye of this storm then mathematically speaking... one could suggest that we've got about 6 weeks to go! Okay... I know this sounds a bit wild to attempt to deduce... but if it's a revelation from God, than Glory to Him for that. If it's not, than I continue to Wait with Joy and Hope, trusting in Him through it all. Amen.

James 1:1-18New International Version (NIV)

1 James, a servant of God and of the Lord Jesus Christ,

To the twelve tribes scattered among the nations:

Greetings.

Trials and Temptations

2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.4 Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. 5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. 6 But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. 7 That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. 8 Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.

9 Believers in humble circumstances ought to take pride in their high position.10 But the rich should take pride in their humiliation—since they will pass away like a wild flower. 11 For the sun rises with scorching heat and withers the plant; its blossom falls and its beauty is destroyed. In the same way, the rich will fade away even while they go about their business.

12 Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him.

13 When tempted, no one should say, “God is tempting me.” For God cannot be tempted by evil, nor does he tempt anyone; 14 but each person is tempted when they are dragged away by their own evil desire and enticed. 15 Then, after desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is full-grown, gives birth to death.

16 Don’t be deceived, my dear brothers and sisters. 17 Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows. 18 He chose to give us birth through the word of truth, that we might be a kind of firstfruits of all he created.

Through the Fire

1Peter 1:6-9 In this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while, if need be, you have been grieved by various trials, 7 that the genuineness of your faith, being much more precious than gold that perishes, though it is tested by fire, may be found to praise, honor and glory at the revelation of Jesus Christ, 8 whom having not seen you love. Though now you do not see Him, yet believing, you rejoice with joy inexpressible and full of glory, 9 receiving the end of your faith – the salvation of your souls.

it's not about the bunny: Part 2

Almost 3 years ago today, I had such an amazing and vivid dream about a "bunny" that I had to capture it in writing. This week, Holy Week 2016 has been a trying one for me. By the Grace of God we sailed through the cold winter months, keeping warm inside by the fireplace, playing board games and our share of sequence. It is officially spring now, but the cold is still lingering, as typical March MN weather does. While the sunshine lately has been Glorious, the cold has me still feeling like doing nothing but bundling up and staying warm inside... which is beginning to cause some serious cabin fever.
In November of 2015, I made the sole decision to quit my job, take my 3rd grader out of the only school she ever knew and walk by faith to be with my parents through a heavy trial they have been going through for quite a while. I have no regrets, in fact, I Thank God that he's showered us with so many daily blessings since then.
I had a breaking point yesterday though.
It turns out, as God would have it, we have inherited a bunny... not just any bunny but a Netherlands Dwarf bunny... small, frail and fragile. The story goes... my aunt (my dad's sister) fell in love and bought this bunny, full well knowing she isn't allowed to have it where she lives and figured it would be a good thing for her brother, my dad (who has dementia)
Since day one, that has not been the case and the bunny has been deemed mine and my daughter's.  She's thrilled and to be honest, I of course have a soft spot for him too. He's very soft and sweet, a cuddle bunny for sure and gives the best kisses with the tiniest tongue!
We are currently still living with my parents and my dad has really shown little to no interest in the bunny since it got here. Yesterday, however, he felt the need to open it's cage and try to fill it's water bowl. He spilt it (not a big deal) but all I heard were some under his breath cussing so I thought I better go look to see what the matter was.
When I saw the newspapers saturated in water and my dad standing there confused, i said, no worries and began to clean it up. For some reason my dad wanted to begin to try to help by grabbing, rather forcefully, the bunny from the cage.  It of course made me nervous for the bunny, I told him that wasn't necessary so he threw the bunny into the cage.  This wrecked me and i tried calmly at first to tell my dad that I could handle the situation, he then picked up the entire smaller box that the bunny was in.  I said all too aggressively "PUT the BOX down". He stood there for a while with the box in his hands, set it down and then walked out of the bathroom.
I finished cleaning up the cage and ran up to my old room (where I lived my jr. and sr. year of high school) and hid.  I hid. For the first time since I've been here, I needed a serious break. I needed to compose myself because I was so devastated by the possibility of this bunnies little leg being fractured or broken or just being so shaken with fear from the whole experience... even if his little bunny body WAS ok.
I hid for what had to be no longer than 5-7 minutes.  As I did, my dad repeatedly worked his way from the basement, to the main floor, to the upstairs (where I was) calling out "hello", "who's here", "Josie?" "Mary?"... "hello"  At first, THAT killed me, but I needed this short break and I also was feeling a tug to see HOW he would continue to handle the situation.  As he made the flights up and down the stairs, his anxiety rose for sure. This, of course, broke my heart. He was just as scared as that bunny.  He knew enough to know that SOMEONE was with him, he felt he lost them and it scared him. I think it scared him to be alone.
Jesus wants us to love all creatures but that incident made me believe He wants me to remember how scared my own father is right now, going through something he has no control over and only half understands any of it. He knows enough to know he needs the people around him for their memories.
The "abuse" of the bunny also reminded me of Jesus and the pain and suffering, the torture that men subjected him to. Jesus was fragile, gentle-hearted like the bunny yet was treated so poorly and all for our sake. it is surely not about the bunny.

Even Still

Turmoil and Blood boil.
Heartache with Smiles fake.
Launching me into Overdrive
Barely making it Out alive.

 Seek ye first, the kingdom of God
And His Righteousness
He held me then, he holds me now
Waiting to see when I’m going to Take that final bow.

 The curtain call
The act is through
I’m wiser now
Pray that much is true.

 Love forever?
Forever I will
Uprooted but not over
Not then or even still.

It's a God Thing. Peace that Passes ALL Understanding.

I am currently in the throes of a battle between my financial peace and financial unrest. Recently, I offered up all too much of my personal information to a total stranger on the phone, claiming to be someone who was there to offer me help or financial peace instead of unrest. However, he didn't leave me with a settling feeling at all, which has since shown to be evident that he in fact, was not to be trusted. Truth be told, there has been so much talk about "identity theft" in the media that it has caused me on more than one occasion to be tested in my Faith that God is in Control of EVERYTHING and that through any challenges that may continue to come my way, He Is The Prince of Peace who offers that Peace 24/7 and it truly does PASS ALL UNDERSTANDING. Also, that my Trust is in Him. NOT my bank account. Trust me, I am not understanding what's all going on, who's abusing my "identity" (i use the quotations because I do know in my heart of hearts that my Identity is Alone IN Christ and can't be taken from me) Today, as i was again tested and stirrings of unrest and anxiety arose over the matter, i pulled out a one dollar bill from my purse and there it was. Peace. Above it... In God We Trust. Amen.

faith… Faith… FAITH

If Faith is something that I am going to have to condition myself into having whole-heartedly and 100% of the time, then my prayer is that I continue to flex my faith muscles. Daily conditioning myself to increase in Faith. God provides. He really, truly, daily, whole-heartedly provides. We see a limb, our human instinct is to be fearful of said limb. It's a limb, it's a flimsy, tiny, unstable limb which, from our human perspective will NOT hold our weight. To go out on a limb and TRUST God (not ourselves or any other human) to provide, to nourish us, mind, body, spirit and soul, it takes guts. It takes courage (core of Courage is "cor" meaning HEART in french). To TRUST Him to make a way for us when we have NO idea HOW He is going to do it, oh ye of little Faith, we really are. He Provides. And in those times where you feel unprovided for, He makes a way. He Provides a way. He Provides THE way when we seek Him and truly Trust Him. "Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen." Hebrew 11:1

1 Peter 1: 3-9

3 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, 4 and into an inheritance that can never perish, spoil or fade. This inheritance is kept in heaven for you, 5 who through faith are shielded by God’s power until the coming of the salvation that is ready to be revealed in the last time. 6 In all this you greatly rejoice, though now for a little while you may have had to suffer grief in all kinds of trials. 7 These have come so that the proven genuineness of your faith—of greater worth than gold, which perishes even though refined by fire—may result in praise, glory and honor when Jesus Christ is revealed. 8 Though you have not seen him, you love him; and even though you do not see him now, you believe in him and are filled with an inexpressible and glorious joy, 9 for you are receiving the end result of your faith, the salvation of your souls.

Patiently Enduring for the Love of My Lord, Jesus Christ

And so after he had patiently endured, he obtained the promise... Hebrews6:15 God's Promises. One has stood out to me as of late: Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. - Psalms 37:4 God promises to give me the desires of my heart. One of the deepest desires I've held since my youth, is a sincere and fruitful marriage to a man who truly desires to grow His walk with Our Lord on a Daily basis. Who not only desires His relationship with God to grow, but for Him and His Wife to grow in Love for God and others together. To walk this Journey side by side. So I patiently wait for that desire to be fulfilled, but until then I can say with great Joy and sincerity that i HAVE delighted in My Lord. He has and will always be my greatest source of strength, of Hope, of Joy and of The Sincerest Love of All. Because God Is Love. And Love is Patient and Kind. and God has shown me immeasurable amounts of patience and kindness. He has shown me Abundant Mercy and compassion. 1 Timothy 1:15-16 15 Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners—of whom I am the worst. 16 But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his immense patience as an example for those who would believe in him and receive eternal life. My God is so Good. He is a Loving and Faithful God, I wait with Joy and Hope for All of His promises to be fulfilled. With Joy and Hope I endure trials of every kind. I journey on this road as one single woman, who knows in her heart of hearts that she is truly Never Alone. God the Father, His Son and The Holy Spirit are always, always with me. Glory to God for that Truth! Amen.

Jesus Calling

Be Still in My Presence, even though countless tasks claim for your attention. nothing is as important as spending time with Me. While you wait in My Presence, I do My best work within you: transforming you by the renewing of your mind. If you skimp on this time with Me, you may plunge headlong into the wrong activities, missing the richness of what i have planned for you. Do not seek Me primarily for what I can give you. Remember that I, the Giver, am infinitely greater than any gift I may impart on you. Though I delight in blessing My children, I am deeply grieved when My blessings become idols in their hearts. Anything can be an idol if it distracts you from Me as your First Love. When I am the Ultimate Desire of your heart, you are safe from danger and idolatry. As you wait in My Presence, enjoy the Greatest gift of all, Christ in you, the hope of Glory! Romans 12:2, Revelation 2:4, Colossians 1:27

it's not about the bunny.

For a couple of years (at least) I've had the blessing of a bunny that frequently snuggles up under a small shrub outside of my bedroom window. To me, it has ALWAYS been a reminder of God's Love for me. I TRULY believe God presents himself in that form because he knows I often open that window shade to let the sun in in the mornings, or even just to peek outside to see what the weather IS doing. Every time I see the bunny it makes my heart melt. It reminds me to Delight myself in the Lord, because all of His Ways TRULY are Good. He knows the deepest desires of my heart, he knows how much I need His Presence and reminders of His Presence. With that single act of kindness, he reminds me that even on my loneliest days, I am truly Never Alone. Last night I had the most awe-striking dream. I dreamt I was looking out the window of my childhood home, there was a bunny just outside of it lying on the rooftop of our porch. It was turned away from me, but i could tell it was struggling to stay alive, it was dying. I wasn't sure what to do, but of course I felt like i needed to try to save it, if i had any power to do so. It found the strength to turn towards me and it saw that I was trying to figure out how I could help it. We both approached the window and I reached out my hand to see If i could feel it through the window screen. I felt it's forehead which turned into a mans forehead! Then He began to ASCEND into the sky and with an intense stare from His most Brilliant Blue eyes, he said "I LOVE YOU". and then disappeared. God sent His One and Only Son, Jesus Christ to Die on the Cross for me, for us. He rose again 3 days later, He ASCENDED into heaven. Surely... it's not about the bunny.

1 John 1: 6-10

6 If we say that we have fellowship with him, and walk in darkness, we lie, and do not the truth: 7 But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship one with another, and the blood of Jesus Christ his Son cleanseth us from all sin. 8 If we say that we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. 9 If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. 10 If we say that we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.

Softly I announce...

My Presence. Shimmering hues of radiance tap gently at your consciousness, seeking entrance. Though I have all Power in heaven and on earth, I am infinitely tender with you. The weaker you are, the more gently I approach you. Let your weakness be a door to My Presence. Whenever you feel inadequate, remember that I am your ever-present Help. Hope in Me, and you will be protected from depression and self-pity. Hope is like a golden cord connecting you to heaven. The more you cling to this cord, the more I bear the weight of your burdens; thus, you are lightened. Heaviness is not of My kingdom. Cling to hope, and My rays of Light will reach you through the darkness. Jesus Calling

1 Peter 1:22-25

Now that you have purified yourselves by obeying the truth so that you have sincere love for each other, love one another deeply, from the heart. 23 For you have been born again, not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and enduring word of God. 24 For, “All people are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall, 25 but the word of the Lord endures forever.”